adore me?
fuck you! you can't adore me. you don't even know me.
adoration is so silly anyways. love me or hate but don't waste my time (or your own) adoring me.
what you feel for me is hardly adoration. you look down your nose at me like a silly child and i let you because i know what game you're playing. you and i both get off on it darling so i'll let it continue but don't fool yourself into thinking that i don't know how it really is.
you look so cute after you've lost it all over my face but it's the meaness in you i like. it's the meaness that keeps you in my life.
the way i figure it we're both pretty stupid.
but you don't adore me, so don't be so fucking glib about it all.
a verbal slap across the face makes us both feel better.
with...adoration?
michelle.
Monday, October 30, 2006
Sunday, October 29, 2006
subway makes bad cookies.
i had a nice evening. i had a glass wine and it made me a little tipsy. i sat and watched most of a very interesting documentary and then i watched this movie called "A ma soeur! (fat girl)" and truthfully, it was pretty boring. just because it's french and there's full-frontal male nudity doesn't make it good.
but that's not what i want to talk about. i want to talk about something IN the movie. usually i save what i'm about to talk about for i masturbate but i'm more curious about this than aroused by it...
so i was watching that "fat girl" movie (irrelevant title by the way) and the fat girl's sister meets this italian boy whom she falls head over heels in love with in about 2.4 seconds. trouble is she's a version and he's older and pushy. she's not willing to have sex with him just yet-on moral grounds-but he somehow manages to convince her that having anal sex isn't the same as 'regular' sex and 'taking in the back' isn't losing your virginity.
cue sister trying to sleep in the same room but having difficulty due to the obviously in pain sister screaming in the bed across the room.
thinking back to losing my virginity (which truthfully, didn't hurt a bit) i can't imagine having anal sex before vaginal sex. i can't imagine anyone convincing me that anal sex wasn't a moral issue if, to me, vaginal sex was.
boys, is this a commonly used line if a girl's unwilling to 'give it up' as readily as you'd like? does this fall into the same catagory as "look how hot you make me baby, you don't want me to have to get myself off do you. that would be gross" or "it hurts too much. i'll get blue balls!"
curious.
anyways, i know it's just a movie and all but you think this girl would have known that anal sex-when you're feeling pressured especially- can be waaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaay more painful than vaginal sex...
discuss.
but that's not what i want to talk about. i want to talk about something IN the movie. usually i save what i'm about to talk about for i masturbate but i'm more curious about this than aroused by it...
so i was watching that "fat girl" movie (irrelevant title by the way) and the fat girl's sister meets this italian boy whom she falls head over heels in love with in about 2.4 seconds. trouble is she's a version and he's older and pushy. she's not willing to have sex with him just yet-on moral grounds-but he somehow manages to convince her that having anal sex isn't the same as 'regular' sex and 'taking in the back' isn't losing your virginity.
cue sister trying to sleep in the same room but having difficulty due to the obviously in pain sister screaming in the bed across the room.
thinking back to losing my virginity (which truthfully, didn't hurt a bit) i can't imagine having anal sex before vaginal sex. i can't imagine anyone convincing me that anal sex wasn't a moral issue if, to me, vaginal sex was.
boys, is this a commonly used line if a girl's unwilling to 'give it up' as readily as you'd like? does this fall into the same catagory as "look how hot you make me baby, you don't want me to have to get myself off do you. that would be gross" or "it hurts too much. i'll get blue balls!"
curious.
anyways, i know it's just a movie and all but you think this girl would have known that anal sex-when you're feeling pressured especially- can be waaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaay more painful than vaginal sex...
discuss.
Sunday, October 15, 2006
scarification.
that's the big news.
and the next step i suppose.
according to the bme encyclopedia:
Cutting is one of the two most common types of scarification (see also: Skin Removal). Cutting consists of drawing a predefined design on the skin via usage of a surgical blade or scalpel. Cutting for negative emotional reasons is considered self-harm.
let's repeat that: cutting for negative emotional reasons is considered self-harm.
that's not what we're getting up to here. i'm getting cut for really positive reasons.
some back story:
i've got some tattoos and some piercings, i'm no longer scared off things based on pain alone.
ryan my fantastic piercer posted a bulletin on myspace that he was learning how to do scarification and wanted some living breathing people to cut open for a reasonable price (scarification is usually HELLA expensive) and i got curious. i didn't decided right away that i was going to do it. i did a bunch of research and went in and talked to ryan, looked at the scapel, and finally decided i was down, or up, or whatever. the thing is, i really trust ryan. he's had needles and hands on all the most intimate parts of my body and never once have i felt uncomfortable or have i been put in needless pain or felt pressured to do anything i didn't want to do. i got my hood pierced cuz i wanted it and now i'm doing this cuz i want it.
and it is a postive thing. life leaves scars on our body so we may as well embrace them and make them our own and embrace life's power to leave it's mark. yes, i'm pushing it a step forward but it's exciting.
i'm also super stoked on the artwork. i'm getting three sparrows (traditional american tattoo style) on my left thigh. in my research i came to discover that sparrows were awarded to sailors based on the distance they had travelled. each sparrow tattoo was equivalent to 5000 nautical miles travelled.
three sparrows=15 000 nautical miles.
no, i haven't travelled 15 000 nautical miles in my 25 years on this planet but fuck, life's a journey and triangles are a nice shape. : ) i may as well document the journey however long it's going to end up being.
it's an adventure.
got questions? ask me and don't make assumptions about my emotional state or a love of pain...
i told a former sexual partner of mine about it and he told me he'd come and cut me up for free if i all wanted to get hurt. that's bullshit. fucking pissed me off. this is going to be a really intense and positive experience for me and i just want people to understand that. i'm not asking you to do it to or even like that i'm doing it. keep your fucking judgements to yourself and if you've got questions, ask me. i'll answer them as best i can.
much love on this fine evening.
michelle.
and the next step i suppose.
according to the bme encyclopedia:
Cutting is one of the two most common types of scarification (see also: Skin Removal). Cutting consists of drawing a predefined design on the skin via usage of a surgical blade or scalpel. Cutting for negative emotional reasons is considered self-harm.
let's repeat that: cutting for negative emotional reasons is considered self-harm.
that's not what we're getting up to here. i'm getting cut for really positive reasons.
some back story:
i've got some tattoos and some piercings, i'm no longer scared off things based on pain alone.
ryan my fantastic piercer posted a bulletin on myspace that he was learning how to do scarification and wanted some living breathing people to cut open for a reasonable price (scarification is usually HELLA expensive) and i got curious. i didn't decided right away that i was going to do it. i did a bunch of research and went in and talked to ryan, looked at the scapel, and finally decided i was down, or up, or whatever. the thing is, i really trust ryan. he's had needles and hands on all the most intimate parts of my body and never once have i felt uncomfortable or have i been put in needless pain or felt pressured to do anything i didn't want to do. i got my hood pierced cuz i wanted it and now i'm doing this cuz i want it.
and it is a postive thing. life leaves scars on our body so we may as well embrace them and make them our own and embrace life's power to leave it's mark. yes, i'm pushing it a step forward but it's exciting.
i'm also super stoked on the artwork. i'm getting three sparrows (traditional american tattoo style) on my left thigh. in my research i came to discover that sparrows were awarded to sailors based on the distance they had travelled. each sparrow tattoo was equivalent to 5000 nautical miles travelled.
three sparrows=15 000 nautical miles.
no, i haven't travelled 15 000 nautical miles in my 25 years on this planet but fuck, life's a journey and triangles are a nice shape. : ) i may as well document the journey however long it's going to end up being.
it's an adventure.
got questions? ask me and don't make assumptions about my emotional state or a love of pain...
i told a former sexual partner of mine about it and he told me he'd come and cut me up for free if i all wanted to get hurt. that's bullshit. fucking pissed me off. this is going to be a really intense and positive experience for me and i just want people to understand that. i'm not asking you to do it to or even like that i'm doing it. keep your fucking judgements to yourself and if you've got questions, ask me. i'll answer them as best i can.
much love on this fine evening.
michelle.
it's all pretty...
i dunno...random?
-i went to cirque du soliel tonight. i was ok. i wanted more CIRCUS and less music. cirque music a bit cheesy and better when background to a kick-ass-death-defying-aerial adventure.
-oprah winfrey makes me want to kill people. here she is: wealthy, powerful and a powerful influence on A LOT of women and she can't even say the word "vagina".
i don't generally watch oprah but i was sick and the idea of doing anything besides laying on the couch zoning out with the tv on was pretty impossible so i ended up watching oprah. sue me. or kill me, actually. so the show is about women's health and aging. whatever. an audience member stands up and asks oprah about vaginal dryness. oprah herself, is not a doctor, so she passes the question onto her doctor guest but before she does that she decides to discuss vaginas in general but does she use the word vagina?
NOPE.
she uses the word VAJAYJAY.
VA-JAY-JAY. say it with me people. VA-JAY-JAY. we're all grown ups here, god forbid we use the proper words to describe our genitalia.
dear oprah,
thanks for being the idiot i always knew you were.
it's called a VAGINA!
xo,
michelle kennedy
-i'm pretty sure superchannel is the new old school. remember when all the cool and/or rich kids in your school had superchannel and you didn't? yeah, i sure do. i'll always remember how rad it was to go on holidays and after a long day of doing whatever you got to come back to the hotel room and watch a movie on superchannel. it wasn't even a fucking rented movie! it was just there!
i was driving past this old old motel the other day and i noticed they had a sign advertising "all rooms with superchannel/air conditioning!" and i wondered if super channel was still awesome. is it? cuz if it is i suddenly feel way less cool than all of my friends and want that shit. lemme know asap, cool?
yeah, that's all. i got some news but it deserves a post of it's own so check back, yo! check. back.
xo michelle
p.s. "rize" is the shit! WATCH THAT MOVIE, STAT! you'll thank me and possibly get krump in your living room.
-i went to cirque du soliel tonight. i was ok. i wanted more CIRCUS and less music. cirque music a bit cheesy and better when background to a kick-ass-death-defying-aerial adventure.
-oprah winfrey makes me want to kill people. here she is: wealthy, powerful and a powerful influence on A LOT of women and she can't even say the word "vagina".
i don't generally watch oprah but i was sick and the idea of doing anything besides laying on the couch zoning out with the tv on was pretty impossible so i ended up watching oprah. sue me. or kill me, actually. so the show is about women's health and aging. whatever. an audience member stands up and asks oprah about vaginal dryness. oprah herself, is not a doctor, so she passes the question onto her doctor guest but before she does that she decides to discuss vaginas in general but does she use the word vagina?
NOPE.
she uses the word VAJAYJAY.
VA-JAY-JAY. say it with me people. VA-JAY-JAY. we're all grown ups here, god forbid we use the proper words to describe our genitalia.
dear oprah,
thanks for being the idiot i always knew you were.
it's called a VAGINA!
xo,
michelle kennedy
-i'm pretty sure superchannel is the new old school. remember when all the cool and/or rich kids in your school had superchannel and you didn't? yeah, i sure do. i'll always remember how rad it was to go on holidays and after a long day of doing whatever you got to come back to the hotel room and watch a movie on superchannel. it wasn't even a fucking rented movie! it was just there!
i was driving past this old old motel the other day and i noticed they had a sign advertising "all rooms with superchannel/air conditioning!" and i wondered if super channel was still awesome. is it? cuz if it is i suddenly feel way less cool than all of my friends and want that shit. lemme know asap, cool?
yeah, that's all. i got some news but it deserves a post of it's own so check back, yo! check. back.
xo michelle
p.s. "rize" is the shit! WATCH THAT MOVIE, STAT! you'll thank me and possibly get krump in your living room.
Wednesday, October 04, 2006
rainy days
it's always the person you least expect who'll make you feel like a million bucks when you need it more than ever.
poor sentance structure aside, thanks person i least expect. part of me always knew you'd come in handy.
poor sentance structure aside, thanks person i least expect. part of me always knew you'd come in handy.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)
