so i'm not always the most...um...responsible gal when it comes to sex. it's my own fault, obviously.
the paranoia that results is baby fear...not std fear but BABY FEAR! think about it: i'm 24, i have ZERO financial stability, ZERO shit laid out for the future...i mean, i know what i want to do but it's not secure. it would be irresponsible of me to have a baby right now and it would be sad for that baby...there are enough poor single mothers out there and i don't need to add to that in any capacity...
so all that being said i'm worrying again. round #2 of pregnancy paranoia.
as a result my errands for the morning resulted in a trip to shoppers drug mart for that little $12 pee stick.
it sucks. SUCKS! there i am, exhausted, when the 15yr old supergoth cashier shows me a moment of solidarity. i can tell. she gets it. there's no judgement, pretense. she gets how much that purchase fucking sucks. how scary it is. how much i DON'T want a kid right now.
the last time this happened i left the drugstore crying. thank god that didn't happen again.
i'm off to pee on a stick. we'll see what happens.
xo m.
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