being old sucks!

ok, so i will 24 years old in exactly 27 sleeps. about a month ago i started to feel like perhaps it was time to take some control of my adult life. university is finished. i travelled. i fell in love (twice). i had my heart broken (twice).

so last month i said a tearful goodbye to the plush couches and infinate television channels of my mothers condo in the suburbs and moved out...out into the adult world of more debt than i care to think about and smoking copious amounts of pot whenever i feel like it right in my motherfucking living-room.

that being said, i still work for my dad.

it was an easy thing to do. he needed someone to sit around and slack off all day and i hate looking for jobs. done and done. i worked for him for a few months, saved some cash, and then took off for a few months to travel and have sex with young republicans in hostels. but that too came to an end so i came back home and back to work in this grimy small office with nothing but the internet and the occasional ring of the telephone to keep me company.

it's terrible. if i were being honest with myself, which i rarely am, i hate my job. i find any excuse i can to be late for work, to leave early, to do whatever...boredom is only exciting for a little while...but being here also keeps me from finding a real job.

now, let's be clear though, i do more than just sit here with my thumb up my ass. i recently started my own theatre company and am currently directing and producing our first show...however, this little passionate endevour makes me no money...in fact, it costs me money!

so, ok...i am sitting here last week being bored and checking my email for the millioneth time that hour when something interesting appears in my inbox. it's a job posting for an administrative position at an ACTUAL THEATRE COMPANY...something actually in my field...HOLY FUCK!

so i am going to apply for this job. the deadline is friday and i am looking forward to writing the cover letter and bragging about my passion for independent theatre and all that jazz but at the same time...

i'm a little scared. i haven't had a 'real' job in more than 2 years (i didn't work my last year of school) and i am not sure i remember how to work in a place where people care what i do with my day. sure, today i'm annoyed because i can't get off at work but a month from now i might not even be able to do tell the entire internet about how i annoyed i am...

being an adult is fucking stressful!

oh, and don't even get me started on the thought of applying for grad school and moving to chicago!

m.